What’s in a name?
Never stop learning. Even after you have completed your collegiate education, challenge yourself to learn new things. I have learned more things after college about business than I did in college. College was a great foundation, but the things I learn every day make my student loan debt worth it. One thing to learn in the real world is the power of knowing people’s names.
One thing that I have learned from a business women that I respect, Erin, is how knowing names generates mutual respect. Most people identify themselves with is their names. When you do not have the courtesy to learn some one’s name, you may be perceived as disrespectful. I noticed that Erin uses people’s names. For example, when a third party is hosting our conference calls, she remembers and uses the moderator’s names. This makes the moderator’s feel respected. Put yourself in the operator’s shoes. If someone always referred to you “Operator” when you have identified yourself as Mary Beth, would you feel less respected? If someone referred to you as “intern,” instead of your name, would you feel degraded (especially when you are not an intern anymore)?
Think about it– when someone mispronounces your name or spells it wrong, how does it make you feel? I go by “Jen” or “Jennifer” professionally. When someone spells my name as “Jenn” in an email trail, when I have already signed my name as “Jen,” I think wow, either they don’t care or they are not paying attention.
It can be hard to remember people’s names, but really challenge yourself. Angela at Girl Meets Business inspired this this post with her latest blog entry, “Six small habits that will change your image immediately.”
Speaking of names, learn other people’s and use them in conversation.
People love to hear their names (whether they know it or not!), and they hate it if you can’t remember their name. Learn the names of people around you and use their name in conversation. Instead of saying, “That was a great meeting,” say, “Great meeting, Liz, I really enjoyed it.” They might not consciously notice it, but you will make them feel a little more special.
If you are uncomfortable using people’s names, practice this concept with your friends. When you are out and about on weekends, try it with people you meet. A great way to build rapport with restaurants, cafes, and bars you may visit is to learn people’s names. I have tried it and it works. Not only is it respectful, using people’s names will help people know you.
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March 14th, 2008 at 11:57 am
I am notoriously horrible with names. I can remember everything down to what color shoes you were wearing when we met, but the name escapes me. Fortunately, I think, I make up for it in other ways. I’m a firm believer in the golden rule of networking: look for ways to help other people. The people in my social sphere are amazed at my ability to keep track of people’s passions and personal/professional needs at any given time. It allows me to share info that’s relevant to them, which, in turn, keeps me on their radar.
March 24th, 2008 at 9:36 am
Despite the terrible title, Nicholas Boothman’s ‘How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less’ is a great (short) book all about establishing rapport during that crucial first impression. He breaks “The Greeting” into five parts: Open (approaching the person with open body language), Eye (establishing eye contact), Beam (smiling), Hi! (a warm greeting), and Lean (subtly tilting towards the other person) — and he definitely stresses the importance of name repetition in order to strengthen that impression and learn the name at the same time.
I followed the link to Angela’s post, and I though she had another stellar tidbit for improving one’s image — introduce yourself with your last name as well. The more information the person reveals about his or her self, the more the the other person will reveal also. Getting more out of someone than just his or her first name goes a very long way in establishing common ground, and those similarities are the key to forming strong relationships.
March 24th, 2008 at 11:44 am
Glenn-
How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less is a great book that I read a few years ago. When I read the book, I was a full time low-level manager at Best Buy. I used the tatics on the sales floor and they worked! My favorite tip from the book is the advice given about breaking down people’s walls. For example, if you are talking with someone who you can visually tell is not open (example: arms are crossed), try mimicking their behavior to get them to loosen up. Subconscious, they will realize a connection between their behaivor and yours. They will loosen up because they recognize the similarity. Once you open a person up, they are more likely to like you and are more likely to negotiate or buy.